SLIGHTLY ODWAY...

Welcome…
‘Tis the issue of the moment…
Why do we, as Christians, fail so miserably at such a simple task as welcoming and accepting people into our church? We spend so much of our time, prayers, emotions and cares on preaching a few individuals in the hope that they’ll come to know Jesus as their Saviour, yet we fail to open up to people who are readily knocking on our doors… It angers me. I do it all the time. I see my friends do it. I went to CCC SCA orientation day today and it happened to me there a bit. I know that I’m quite an outgoing person and I usually make the initial efforts to integrate myself into a new crew of people, but I still felt slightly rejected. All the first year students (that’s me) were assigned a second or third year buddy. I got put with a lovely third year student called Emily. But even though we both made an effort, there was a feeling that I was just a burden and really she just wanted to catch up with her friends who she hadn’t seen in a few months but was stuck with her little buddy. But that’s ok, I released her from her burden as soon as I could.

But pondering afterwards, it so dawned on me that this is how people must feel going into new churches. They step out of there car with the resolution that this is gonna be cool and it’ll be fun to make friends. Then as they near the doors and hear the laughing and jesting, a thought enters their head that, "hey, I’m here by myself and I’m gonna have to put in some effort to enfold myself in a group". If this doesn’t make them reconsider their decision to try out this new church, the next image might. As they round the corner and enter through the half open doors, they look around and observe the ‘holy huddles’. At this, a dismal revelation conjures in their mind that they know no one and no one wants to know them coz everybody here already has enough friends and they’re all quite content. Embarrassed at their folly, the ‘newbie’ quickly finds the nearest seat (obviously up the back of the church) to hind in, and is left alone by all other church-goers who sit in their own little clicks. The service begins and no one notices the little newbie up the back hiding behind the pews. The worship-leaders worship, the preachers preach, the congregation congregates. Then the service ends and a fear of being spotted because of their lonerism grips the newbie, and they leave quickly without ever interacting. They don’t come back.
And we all know that that’s a seriously common story!
What’s wrong with us? Are we seriously that self-centred? Why?
It’s especially true in Sydney. Everyone seems so busy, too booked up for a chat. Someone asks us what we’re doing this week and if we’d like to hang out for a coffee and we automatically whip out our diaries and check our previous engagements, cringing slightly, then resolve for a small 1hr slot in a week-and-a-halves time away…
Maybe it’s a matter of genuine invitation – we need to feel like we’ve been allowed to interact with others, without feeling like we’re bothering or inconveniencing others.

But how did Jesus, the true perfect model, manage this? Surely He didn’t carry around a little pocket diary. He was always welcoming people into His presence. Actually, more than that, people were drawn to His presence, not because of superficial reasons like appearance (for which He would probably have been quite unattractive anyway – well, they didn’t have showers back then and was tramping around on dusty roads and deodorant didn’t exist back then…) or wealth (as He definitely wasn’t rich in material possessions). What was it that He contained that expressed an invitation that caused multitudes of people to throng around Him? What was it that allowed people to feel able to be vulnerable in front of Him?
Was not that same Spirit of love within Him the same Spirit that is supposedly within us? If so, what’s happened and where has it gone?

We spend so much time promoting ourselves, our youth group, our church, etc, but we never take the time to welcome people who come along. It’s just common knowledge now that, even though Hillsong have the largest number of people in their church, they also have the highest drop-out rate…

So I tried to justify it all by thinking that, the bigger the church, the more clicks and the easier to overlook newbies. But then I remembered a friend telling me how she’d visited a church service of about 12 other Christians, and not one said hello to her the whole time she was there.

So if it’s not the quantity that’s the issue, is it the quality???
It’s painful to agree isn’t it?
How could our church become so inwardly focused when we’re always preaching about the outward aspects of growth? We continue to fight the good fight, but maybe it’s not quite the right fight. Maybe the real battle is not going on outside the church walls, but within. Maybe there’s someone in the back row that has come to our church a few times and they’re just waiting for someone to genuinely welcome them. Maybe they’re not just in the back row. Maybe they’re the person I sit next to every week who I think feels included, but maybe they really are just craving for someone to re-connect with them.
I know I make the excuse that "I’m on worship tonight, so I’m exempt" or "I’ve been helping out with the youth, so this is my time with my friends and my God", but is that really being gracious?

I know that this post is probably not gonna be read by many, and probably not all the way through either, so really it’s just me expressing my frustration with my self-centred-ness and the blindness of some of my friends. Please don’t think I’m condemning anyone in particular. This is just something that’s been really close to my heart of late, and it keeps popping up in many of my conversations. Heck, our bible study at homegroup tonight focused on this sorta stuff!

Sorry if I've offended anyone.
You're all very much welcome to chat with me about it. Really really. Talk with me - I invite you. Just wait a second while I get my diary out though...

ok, sorry, that last little bit was a bit scum. but it's so true...